You should never pay a publisher to publish your song! Having a demo of your song is helpful to get it signed, but if a publisher likes your song enough, they should cover everything from demo costs to song plugging. Be careful.
When a writer can't come in person, today's technology makes it easy to have a virtual meeting. We are able to share desktops and see each other. These classes start at the beginning. Song structure and rhyme schemes, to advanced techniques. They also include looking and listening to what you have written and giving advice. The writer retains 100% ownership of their song unless other arrangements are agreed upon.